Gravity Falls Ask Column
by TheLPSDragon
Summary: Remember this? Well, I finally fixed it, so Z and I are back in business! If you no Guest, you PM. If you Guest, you Review. If you want to say something nice, you Review. Okay? Okay. Become one with Mother Russia, da?


Question: Mabel, do you like Pacifica x Dipper?

Mabel: Oh HECK to the NO! *cries* WADDLES COMFORT ME!

Question: Wendy, do you love Dipper?

Wendy: Ummm… This is an awkward situation… but uh, not really. More like a Brother.

Dipper: She totally loves me. *squee*

Mabel: OMG A DINOSAUR! WHAT THE HECK! WHAT THE HECK!

Question: Mabel, would you like a vampire boyfriend, or a werewolf boyfriend?

Mabel: Vampire!

Dipper: OH COME ON! ASK ME SOMETHING ALREADY!

Question: Dipper, do you like it when Wendy spies on you while you're reading and then fantasizes about you?

Dipper: OMIGOSH SHE DOES THAT?! YES, YES, YES!

Question: Dipper, do you want revenge on Gideon?

Dipper: Kinda obvious. I HATE him. I mean, there are YAOI FAN FICS ABOUT US!

Question: Dear Dipper, who is oldest, you or Mabel?

Dipper: Mabel. She is older b-

Mabel: BY 5 MINUTES!

Question: Stan, would you give up your money to save Dipper or Mabel?

Stan: Sure. How much, a dollar?

Question: Dear Dipper,  
Will you ever go on date with Pacifica?  
What if she was nicer to you and your sister then will go out with her?

Dipper: No. She's a jerk.

Mabel: A BIG FAT JERK!

Dipper: If she was nicer… not gonna happen.

Question: Why do you have the same chapter twice?  
Grunkle Stan, when did you start scamming people?  
Soos, where do you live?  
Wendy, what's your mom look like?  
Dipper, do you have a crush in Piedmont?  
Mabel, how many friends do you have in Piedmont?

Stan: A long, long, time ago, in a galaxy far, far, away *cue Star Wars theme*

Soos: In a cabin near the Shack.

Wendy: She died after my last brother's birth, like 5 years ago. I don't really remember.

Dipper: I had a crush on … um… Mabel's best friend, Caitlynn.

Mabel: About 20.

Question: Soos, how old are you?

Soos: 26.

Question: Dipper, do you ship Robbie X Mabel?

Dipper: NO! NEVER! NO MOBBIE! NO, JUST… NO!

Question: Grunkle Stan, are you the kids uncle on their mother or fathers side?

Stan: Father's side.

Question: Gideon, do you love Pacifica?  
Pacifica, do you like Mabel?  
Robbie, do you like-like… DIPPER?!

Gideon: EWW, NO! MABEL IS MAH WOMAN! ALL MAHN!

Pacifica: No. I hate silly people. I'm outta here.

Robbie: You are disgusting. Yaoi is not my thing. I'm fricking GOTH.

Question: Robbie, when will you give Dipper a chance for Wendy?

Robbie: No.

All questions were sent in by TheBigZ1! I, Raven Pines, love your stories; they have brought tears to my Goth eyes.

Question: Dear Dipper, do wizards and elves exist in Gravity Falls? Does Slenderman?

Dipper: Yes. Yes they do. *puts on sunglasses while epic music plays*

Question: Gideon-what is your plan on making Mabel your queen?  
Raven-would you ever wear Mabel's sweater?  
Soos- when will you grow up?  
Dipper-Did you ever do the lamby dance in front of your friends  
Stan- who is your fave Mabel or Dipper?  
Robbie- do you really like Wendy?  
Wendy-who do you hate the most in gravity falls?

Gideon: Yes. Yes ah Will. Ah'll hypnotize her!

Raven: NEVER! *hiss* I'm wearing only black and silver turtle necks. That's it.

Soos: NEVER!

Dipper: Sadly, yes.

Stan: Neither. They both cost money.

Robbie: *scoff* Duh!

Wendy: Gideon and Pacifica.

Question: Dear Raven, What does Dipper do when no one's around? (Other than singing Disco  
Girls)  
Dear Robbie, Do you like anime? If so, do you like Bleach?  
Dear Stan, Were you ever married?  
DDDEEERRPPP

Raven: He watches My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.

Robbie: Yeah, I watch it from time to time, but I do like Bleach.

Stan: *scoff* Yes, but we're divorced.

Question: Mabel, what do you think of PacificaxDipper fan fiction?  
I personally love the pair it classic rich girl falls in love with nerdy but cute boy romance story.  
Also why does every one seem to like Wendy and Dipper? I just can't see them together.  
Sign, Hopeless Romantic

Mabel: No to the no.

Raven: Let's see, because Pacifica is a snob, and Dipper is actually cute? *scoff*

Me: Dipper likes Wendy, so the Fallers made Dipper and Wendy into a cute couple!

Raven: *chokes* WHAT? Dipper CUTE?! WHAT THE FRICK!

Question: Wendy do think you ever cut your hair?  
Also Wendy what do see in Robbie anyway you do know he is a jerk to Dipper

Wendy: NEVER EVER WILL I CUT MAH FRICKING HAIR! Also, ROBBIE'S BULLYING DIPPER?! WHAT A JERK! Gosh, we're OVER!

Question: Yay! Someone likes my stories!  
Raven, do you have a crush? Do you think Dipper has a chance with either, Mabel, Wendy, Pacifica, Grenda, Candy, or… YOU!  
Pine twins, how much do you like Raven, and why?  
Soos, do you have a crush?  
Wendy, if you and Robbie got in a fight, who do you think would win? (That's actually pretty obvious)

Raven: Ok…. This is hard to say…. But Robbie!

Dipper: WHAT?!

Raven: Dipper ALSO has a chance of going out with Candy, 'cuz their nerds!

Dipper/Mabel: She's our sister, yes, sister. She's goth, but ADORABLE! Not to mention, we're … triplets…

Soos: Um, Hambone, I have to say, LAZY SUSAN!

Everyone: *GASP*

Soos: What?

Wendy: Kinda obvious.

Q: Awesome!  
GF gang, what scares you the most?

Everyone: Bad shippings.

Q: Raven, what is the most un-Mabel like thing she's done, and the same thing about Dipper.  
Robbie, would you ever befriend Dipper?  
Wendy, would you ever date Dipper?  
Mabel, would you ever date… PACIFICA?

Raven: Mabel decided to be goth for 1 day, and miserably failed. Dipper tried wearing a sweater of Mabel's, but miserably failed.

Robbie: No.

Wendy: Whatever. *sips cola*

Mabel: *vomits*

Q: Wendy, is there any hope for you and Dipper?  
Dipper, will you use this chance to sweep Wendy away?  
Robbie, how does it feel to finally get what you deserve, you F***KING A**HOLE! Sorry, got a little emotional. I just hate people who are jerks to the twins.

Wendy: Yah, whatever.

Dipper: YES.

Robbie: Ow. *in body cast*

Me: HEY NO CUSSING!

Q: Dipper/Mabel: What's the weirdest thing Raven's done?  
Robbie: why do you think I don't like you?  
Wendy: what's the scariest thing Dipper and Mabel have done?  
Raven: Where were you when Dipper and Mabel were trying to disprove Pacifica's  
great grandfather didn't discover gravity falls.  
Soos: Whatever happened between you and that Deuce guy?  
Grunkle Stan: who's your favorite triplet?

Dipper/Mabel: Cutting off a dolls head… a baby doll head…

Robbie: * still in body cast* Umm I guess because I bully Dipper? *receives punch from Wendy* OW!

Wendy: When Dipper and Mabel were nearly turned into Dementors, I mean, they like, were like, half skeleton, half ghost. They tried to suck my soul out…

Raven: In Piedmont, being sick.

Soos: Who's Deuce? (That explains a lot)

Stan: Raven. She only wants weapons and Goth stuff. Also, she doesn't talk a lot. Also, she stays out of sight when she arrived.

Robbie: Yeah, giving ME goo-goo eyes!

Q: Dear Robbie,

Do you know what karma means?

Robbie: Karma? Yeah, it means that if you do something good, you'll have a great afterlife. If you do something bad, you'll have a terrible afterlife. I'm Goth. I learned it in my World History class in the 6th grade. DUH.

Q: Luna Shadow: Raven, Mabel, Dipper, Soos, Wendy, and Uncle Stan: Do any of you  
believe that a person can change themselves for the better good?

Raven: No.

Mabel: NO

Dipper: No

Soos: No

Wendy: Absolutely not.

Stan: No…

Q: Dipper, do you find sex between You (Dipper), Gideon, and Grenda HOT?

Dipper: EWW! *vomits*

Q: Wendy do you find sex between Dipper, Gideon, and Lazy Susan at the same  
time HAWT?

Wendy: EWW NO! *VOMIT*

Q: Dipper, why do you hate Robbie so much? Like yeah sure, he was dating the love  
of your life, but he liked her too! And Mabel, it's obvious you have a crush on  
Robbie, just admit it.

Dipper: Because he's Goth.

Mabel: No, RAVEN has a crush on Robbie, not me!

Raven: …

Q: When did Dipper and Mabel turn into Dementors?  
Soos: what is the limit of what you can fix?  
Robbie: I'm glad you're in a cast.  
Wendy: What's the silliest thing Dipper did? What's the most serious thing  
Mabel ever did? What is the nicest thing Raven did?  
Raven: What're your hobbies?  
Grunkle Stan: how many people do you scam on a daily average?

Me: It's a fan adventure I had in my head when you sent that question.

Soos: I cannot fix a computer dude, I CAN NOT!

Robbie: I'm out of it now. HA HA!

Wendy: Dipper did the Lamby, Lamby Dance; Mabel did a mystery all on her own… or when she was Discorded. Raven, well that hasn't happened yet. Wait! She smiled.

Raven: I like killing dolls, beating up people, kissing a special somepony, watching MLP: FIM, AND hoarding weapons.

Stan: I scam exactly 100 people EACH and EVERY day.

Q: Gideon what will you do if you found out Mabel was dating another boy?  
Mabel what if Gideon changed into a better person with a heart what will you  
do?  
Dipper what is the creepiest thing Gideon ever done to Mabel?  
Raven did you ever kiss a boy?  
Wendy do you feel like you're the only normal person in gravity falls?  
Robbie did you ever wear pink? Or bright colors cause you were bored?  
Soos how much does Stan pays you?  
Stan do you have book number 1?

Gideon: I will KILL him!

Mabel: I will be MAKEOVER BUDDIES! And pluck every single eyelash out of his face! *laughs evilly*

Dipper: Touching her hair…

Raven: I kiss a picture of Robbie every night…

Wendy: No. Even I have secrets, too.

Robbie: NEVER! NEVER!

Soos: I work for free.

Stan: Book what?

Q: Question for Mabel: Ya want some smile dip?  
Q for Dipper: Sup?  
Q for Raven: What would you do if you were forced to wear a rainbow sweater  
with pinkie pie on it?  
Q for Wendy: Do you watch Danny Phantom?  
Q for Soos: Do you have a crush?  
Q for Stan: Will you give Gideon a hug?  
2nd Q for Dipper: would it weird you out if I told you that in some fanfics  
you and Gideon are in LOVE?

Mabel: EVIL!

Dipper: WASSUP!

Raven: I'd wear it. Mabel ALREADY made me one. I wear it when I'm alone.

Wendy: Oh, that guy? No. He visits Gravity Falls like, every 2 months for Ghost Hunters Con.

Soos: Umm… Lazy Susan.

Everyone: *GASP!* Again

Stan: EWWWWWWW NOOOOOOOOO!  
Dipper: Very. *vomits*

Q: Dipper and Mabel, what's your favorite thing about duct tape

Dipper: It's very useful.

Mabel: IT'S STICKY!

Q: what do all of you think of the stories written about you guys by  
IAMASEXYMAN, Gravity**s, MysteryTwins, MabellyPineedles, and DipperDick? Don't  
know them search them up and read the stories.

Everyone: 1. Creepy and terrible. 2. Can't find. 3. OH MY GOSH THAT'S CREEPY! 4. Eww AND creepy. 5. GROSS!

Q: Dear Mabel  
I am a shy person can you teach me how to be outgoing like you?

Mabel: Well, you can smile, and say hi to somebody! Then, you can start up a conversation! Have fun being outgoing!

Q: Q for Dipper: Do you play minecraft? And if you do, are you good at it? Also,  
can I wear your hat?  
Q for Mabel: Will you make me a Gravity Falls sweater?  
Q for Soos: Stan and Lazy Susan are going out. What are you going to do about  
it?  
Message for Stan: Gideon is standing right behind you with a baseball bat.  
RUN!  
Q for Wendy: If you know Danny Phantom, will you introduce me?  
Message for Dipper: Dude you're awesome!  
2nd Q for Mabel: Do you know what Gangnam Style is? If you do, will you sing  
it?

Dipper: Minecraft. Never really liked it. Also, sure. You can wear it for $20.00. Just Kidding.

Mabel: On it! I'll add a pony, a kitty, Dipper's face, my face, a rainbow, a Derpy Hooves, your face, a tree, a Shmebulock…

Stan: * whacks Gideon with a baseball bat then kisses his money*

Wendy: Ok! *grabs Danny* Hey Danny! This is Adventuretimegirl443!

Danny: OK, hi ATG443! Can I go to the bathroom now?

Wendy: Fine.

Dipper: Thank you!

Mabel: No. I don't know the Gangnam Style. Is that the one with Hatsune Miku singing gibberish?

Raven: No, that's Ivean Polka.

Mabel: OH. Sorry, no.

Q: Raven/Dipper: the gnomes have kidnapped Mabel again. How do you get her back?  
Mabel/Raven: Gideon's trying to cut Dippers tongue out again. How do you beat  
him?  
Soos: how often do you take a break?  
Grunkle Stan: what do you do with all the money you make?  
Wendy: do me a favor and put Robbie back in a cast will ya?  
Robbie: you suck.  
All: have you read my story what do angels look like? What do you think of  
Avy?

Dipper: I'll use one of Raven's many weapons.

Raven: Same here.

Mabel: KILL HIM!

Raven: KILL HIM AND CUT HIS TOUNGE OUT! :D

Soos: Whenever I can, dude.

Stan: Hoard them in my bedroom.

Wendy: No. I can't hurt him or Stan will hurt me.

Robbie: You suck too.

Everyone: AWW! THAT STORY ROCKED!

Q: Message for Dipper: I know a secret about Stan...  
Q for Stan: What's behind the vending machine HMM? Secret evil junk? A demon?  
DERPY HOOVES?  
Q for Mabel: Why are you so flipping hilarious?! XD  
Q for Wendy: How long is your hair?  
Q for Gideon: How much do you weigh you little chubby bucket?  
Q for Raven: Will you kick Gideon in the stomach for me?  
Q for Soos: Are you a fan of Dora?  
Message for Robbie: I'm with BigZ1, YOU SUCK!  
Q for Robbie: Let's test your smarts, WHAT'S AN ASTRONOMER?

Dipper: Tell me… NOW!

Stan: Aw, you busted me! I keep Derpy Hooves down there. :(

Mabel: Because I'm AWESOME!

Wendy: It's 3 feet long.

Gideon: 150 lbs.

Raven: Sure! I'll be GLAD to!

Soos: I LOVE DORA THE EXPLORER!

Me: I HATE DORA THE EXPLORER!

Robbie: *starts crying* Why do you HATE me so MUCH?

Robbie: An astronomer is a person who studies space and stars. Unlike the meteorologists, they DO NOT study the Earth. They study outer space. Learned THAT in 5th grade Science!

Q: Hmm... Well, Robbie, what does the word penultimate mean? HUH? (Yes, it's a real word, from the 16 century or so)

Robbie: Penultimate means second to last, or the other word, penult, means related to a penult. So HA!

Q: Mabel, how do you ask a girl out? You should know because well, you're a girl

Mabel: Say hi to her! Also, do what Robbie the Ultra Nerd/Goth did for Wendy!

Q: Mabel what if you fell in love but it's a wolf boy?  
Dipper what if I tell you that 15 girls in my school are in love with you?  
Gideon whens the first time you really had feelings for Mabel?(not when you  
looked outside your tent at her… you had an evil plan there)  
Raven do you have a plan on making Robbie your bf because if you do I want in  
(evil laugh)HA HA HA  
Wendy why is Pacifica so scared of you?  
Robbie I have 1 thing to say to you and that's...YOU FREAKING ROCK! :D  
Stan Gideon is your best friend don't deny it  
Soos in once of your life were you smart?

Mabel: I'd ride on his back and call him a pony!

Dipper: …

Me: *whispers* I love you… (Make that 16)

Dipper: SWEET!

Gideon: When we sat on mah rooftop!

Raven: Kidnap him and kiss him until he says he'll date me! :D

Wendy: Because my father's a lumberjack!

Robbie: You are so nice to me… *cries tears of joy*

Stan: Nope. I hate Gideon, and that's final.

Soos: When I was in kindergarten.

Q: Q for Robbie: Grr... I WILL GET YOU ROBBIE! Okay, okay, I've calmed down. What  
is Alpha Centauri? I WILL PROVE I'M SMARTER THAN YOU!  
Q for Stan: Do you have a baseball bat handy so I can hit Robbie with it?  
Q for Soos: what's 2+2?  
Q for Dipper: what's your favorite food?  
Q for Mabel: Do you play scribblenauts?  
Q for Gideon: why are you so creepy?

Robbie: The Alpha Centauri is a constellation. Duh. I am WAAAAY smarter than you.

Stan: Nope. But I have 10 guns!

ATG433: Thanks. *looks in gun* WHAT?! No bullets?

Soos: Umm… 4?

Dipper: I like muffins. *cue derp face while playing creepy music as screen goes red*

Mabel: What's scribblenauts?

Me: I have no idea.

Gideon: Creepy? Me? Lil' Old Me is NOT creepy, but ADORABLE!

Q: Robbie I'm sending you a cursed hoodie!

Robbie: :(

Some Questions TheBigZ1 answered:

Q: Question for everyone: If you could have anything what would it be? Also for  
everyone: If you could do anything what would it be? One more for everyone: If  
you could have one superpower, what would it be? Question for everyone again!  
What's your biggest secret? Dipper: You're flippin' awesome! You get a cookie!

Dipper: The one book, solve every mystery in the world, super strength, I don't have any secrets.  
Mabel: What about those love letters to Wendy?  
Dipper: Not now Mabel, and yay Cookie!  
Avy: can I have some?  
(Dipper looks at her skeptically, then jumps when Remus growls. Breaks cookie in half and gives half of it to Avy)  
Avy: Thanks daddy!  
Mabel: The world's most powerful bedazzler, make the worlds prettiest sweater, and super speed, so I can do everything faster, and I have a… black sweater in the back of my closet.  
Wendy: A nice boyfriend, hang out all summer, flight so I don't have to drive everywhere, and I have a crush on Remus.  
Soos: (dreamily) Lazy Susan  
All: Eww  
Soos: work for mister Pines forever! And super intelligence, so I can know everything, because (looks left and right nervously) I think I'm really childish.  
Grunkle Stan: All the cash in the world scam the president out of Fort Knox, and the ability to talk my way out of anything, and… I think I actually care about the kids. I have no idea who that Remus guy is though.  
Remus: that's the way I like it.A big K-bar knife, kill the world's largest buck, that would taste delicious, I can already shape-shift so I want teleportation, and… (Whispers) I have a crush on Mabel.  
Avy: I got all I need right here. (Gives everyone a hug, then nibbles on cookie), get my revenge on the jerk who hurt me, I can be invincible, and I don't have any secrets, I've been truly alive in the past two weeks!

Raven: Robbie. To have every weapon in the world. Invisibility. I have a pink my little pony sweater.

Robbie: A castle. To kill Dipper. Super Speed. I want to work at the Mystery Shack.

Gideon: Mabel. To kill Dipper Pines. Magic. I think I have anger issues.

Q: Q for Robbie: if you think you're so smart, THEN WHO WAS JULES VERNE?!  
Message for Stan: Get some bullets. -_-  
Q for Dipper: What's your IQ?  
Q for Mabel: Do you think of Soos as a brother?  
Q for Soos: You realize Lazy Susan is WAY too old for you right?  
Message for Gideon: Dude, let's face it, you're creepy, you little chubby bucket.  
Q for Wendy: Why Robbie? He's a jerk, AND he's unattractive.  
Message for Robbie: CURSE YOU ROBBIE

Robbie: Jules Verne was a French author famous for his book, 20,000 leagues under the sea.

Stan: Already on it! (Holds cases, but can't figure out how to load gun)

Dipper: About 131 I think.

Mabel: Yeah, but not as good a one as Dipper.

Soos: I'll never give up! Love always finds a way!

All: eewwww

Gideon: How dare y'all insult me! I am the cutest person in Gravity Falls  
dogonit!

All: No you're not.

Gideon: (Growls, then backs away into forest) This isn't the last time y'all  
see of lil old me!

Wendy: Kid is a creeper, and I usually go for the guitar playing loners  
anyway, but I do not date bullies!

Robbie: :( You all hate me… I sad now.

Q: Gideon-how do you have hair on your Mabel doll? O-O is it real Mabel hair if so  
how did you get it?  
Mabel-do you think there's someone special in gravity falls you would like to  
date?*grins*  
Soos-LAZY SUSAN IS TOO OLD FOR YOU*HITS HEAD*have sense man  
Stan-do you realize Gideon could come in your house and kidnap Mabel and  
sheriff Blubs won't do anything?(sleep with 1 eye open)  
Dipper-I think you're the most adorable thing in gravity falls *whisper*better  
than Gideon-3-  
Raven-do you know the song "tik tok" by Ke$ha and can you sing it?  
Wendy-I LOVE YOUR HAT!  
Robbie-YOUR SO AWESOME YOUR SMART GOD YOU ROCK I LOVE YOU! (Don't worry Raven I  
love him as you rock kind of way)

Gideon: I cut off Mabel's hair for her and Dipper's dolls.

Mabel: I WANNA VAMPIRE BOYFRIEND!

Soos: My love will never die!

Stan: That's why I have 10 guns!

Dipper: Don't call me adorable!

Raven: I don't really like that song, but here you go:

com

nagareteku toki no naka de demo  
kedarusa ga hora guruguru mawatte  
watashi kara hanareru kokoro mo  
mienai wa sou shiranai?  
jibun kara ugoku koto mo naku  
toki no sukima ni nagasare tsuzukete  
shiranai wa mawari no koto nado  
watashi wa watashi sore dake

Lyrics from

yume miteru? nanimo mitenai?  
kataru mo muda na jibun no kotoba?  
kanashimu nante tsukareru dake yo  
nanimo kanjizu sugoseba ii no  
tomadou kotoba ataeraretemo  
jibun no kokoro tada uwa no sora  
moshi watashi kara ugoku no naraba  
subete kaeru no nara kuro ni suru

Lyrics from

konna jibun ni mirai wa aru no?  
konna sekai ni watashi wa iru no?  
ima setsunai no? ima kanashii no?  
jibun no koto mo wakaranai mama  
ayumu koto sae tsukareru dake yo  
hito no koto nado shiri mo shinai wa  
konna watashi mo kawareru no nara  
moshi kawareru no nara shiro ni naru?

Lyrics from

nagareteku toki no naka de demo  
kedarusa ga hora guruguru mawatte  
watashi kara hanareru kokoro mo  
mienai wa sou shiranai?  
jibun kara ugoku koto mo naku  
toki no sukima ni nagasare tsuzukete  
shiranai wa mawari no koto nado  
watashi wa watashi sore dake

Lyrics from

yume miteru? nanimo mitenai?  
kataru mo muda na jibun no kotoba?  
kanashimu nante tsukareru dake yo  
nanimo kanjizu sugoseba ii no  
tomadou kotoba ataeraretemo  
jibun no kokoro tada uwa no sora  
moshi watashi kara ugoku no naraba  
subete kaeru no nara kuro ni suru

Lyrics from

muda na jikan ni mirai wa aru no?  
konna tokoro ni watashi wa iru no?  
watashi no koto wo iitai naraba  
kotoba ni suru no nara: "rokudenashi"  
konna tokoro ni watashi wa iru no?  
konna jikan ni watashi wa iru no?  
konna watashi mo kawareru no nara  
moshi kawareru no nara shiro ni naru?

Lyrics from

ima yume miteru? nanimo mitenai?  
kataru mo muda na jibun no kotoba?  
kanashimu nante tsukareru dake yo  
nanimo kanjizu sugoseba ii no  
tomadou kotoba ataeraretemo  
jibun no kokoro tada uwa no sora  
moshi watashi kara ugoku no naraba  
subete kaeru no nara kuro ni suru

Lyrics from

ugoku no naraba ugoku no naraba  
subete kowasu wa subete kowasu wa  
kanashimu naraba kanashimu naraba  
watashi no kokoro shiroku kawareru?

Lyrics from

anata no koto mo watashi no koto mo  
subete no koto mo mada shiranai no  
omoi mabuta wo aketa no naraba  
subete kowasu no nara kuro ni nare!

Raven: Wait that was Bad Apple. Whatever!

Wendy: You are so kind!

Robbie: Finally! A fan!

-Robbie the All Powerful Wizard

Q: Message/Question for Robbie: HECK YES! YOU USED IMPROPER GRAMMAR! It's "I'M  
sad now" not "I sad now"! HA! YES! Anyway, what was Jules Verne's middle name?  
Looks like I am smarter than you. *evil laugh*  
Q for Dipper: Speaking of girls liking you there's about 12 girls at my school  
who think you're attractive. *whispers* including me. *regular voice* HA! I  
didn't say anything! Nope nothing about me Finding you mildly attractive! Heh  
heh. PLEASE DON'T READ THIS.  
Message for Mabel: ONWARDS AYOSHIAMA!  
Q for Stan: How much money do you get a day?  
Q for Soos: Do you watch Adventure Time (it's my favorite show! Obviously.)  
Q for Wendy: Have you read "A journey to the center of the earth"? It's my  
favorite book.

Robbie: I meant to do that. Duh. Btw, it's Gabriel.

Dipper: Uh, oookkaaaayyyyy.

Mabel: How do you know about that? (Stares down suspiciously)

Stan: Depends on how stupid my customers are.

Soos: (Walks in wearing Finns hat, shirt, shorts, a green backpack, a  
cardboard sword, and waddles dressed up as a yellow bull dog) Occasionally.

Mabel: Gimme my pig! (Snatches waddles, and inspects him) Eeee! He's so cute!

Wendy: I had to read it for a school report. Watched the movie instead. I  
bombed that test hard!

Dipper: that's because the movie isn't based on the book.

Q: who is the best at call of duty?

All: Dipper

Mabel: He plays games none stop at home.

Q: Mabel- I think you and Dipping sauce and Raven are the cutest things ever! (better than gideon-3- )Do you like waffles or pancakes?  
Raven-can we work together on kidnapping Robbie PLEASSSEEE!  
(you can keep him then)  
Gideon-do you really think yourself as "cute" because people vomit when there near you  
Wendy-do you have an axe because if you do KILL PACIFICA  
Stan-when did you start becoming arch enemies with Gideon?  
Dipper-*whisper* I have a plan on you getting rid of Gideon go to a Halloween store get a black robe use Wendy axe and scared Gideon out of town...pp.'s*whisper again* marry me:3i love you  
Robbie- YOU ARE MY FAVEORITE PERSON IN THE WORLD I JUST found out you were smart god you're the total package I don't blame Raven  
DONT FORGET YOU ROCK!  
Soos-WHY DO YOU LIKE LAZY SUSAN SHES OLDER THEN YOU!*hits head* knock out of it man!

Q: Remus and Avy, why are you so adorable? Sorry, Dipper, but these 2 are more adorable than you!

Mabel: -_- That's creepy, but thanks! Also, it's muffins. (Cue Derp face with creepy music and a red screen)

Raven: Sure. Now what shall we do… OOH! I could put him in a sack…

Gideon: Ah am THE most adorable thing on Earth!

Robbie: *vomit*

Wendy: Ya, but Dipper just took it. And even if I did have it, I wouldn't murder a twelve year old girl!

Stan: About a month ago.

Dipper: That'll work? Let's do it! (Snickers evilly, then leaves)

Remus: I could've just attacked the kid for peat sake!  
Avy: You probably would've eaten him.  
Remus: (nods) What, that's a bad thing?  
Avy: (shakes head frustrated)  
Robbie: You are so kind to me… YOU ROCK!

Raven: HE'S MINE!

Robbie: What?  
Soos: She's pretty! And dude, that didn't work. (Removes hat, revealing a plastic cup) My patented, "hat cups", specifically designed to hide under anyone's hat.  
Everyone wearing a hat: (nods, with murmurs of, I got one, wearing it now, works wonders.)

Dipper: (returns, in black cloak, dragging axe sadly) It didn't work; he just laughed in my face.

Remus: (pats shoulder comfortingly) Aw, you did your best bud.  
Avy: You look pretty scary to me.  
Dipper: (smiles, then hands axe back to Wendy and starts chasing Avy, who's laughing uncontrollably all the while)  
Remus: While they're busy, I'm not adorable!  
Me: OH YES YOU ARE, REMUS! DON'T DENY IT!  
Mabel: Of course you are! (Starts scratching ribs, causing him to pound the ground with foot) You're like a puppy! (giggles)  
Remus: (blushes, but doesn't tell her to stop)

Raven and Robbie: I wish Mom and Dad loved me THAT much.

Raven: *noogies Avy* C'mere ya little sucker!

Avy: NEVER!  
Q: LOL! I have a question for you write a Pinecest Fic?  
I like the ship and I would like to see you try to write a fic for it.  
And Soos, can you sing I set fire to the rain by Adele?  
P.S  
HAPPY NEW YEAR, EVERYONE!  
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO  
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO  
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO  
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO  
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO  
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH  
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHH!

Me: I HATE PINECEST! It's gross, and Alex Hirsch doesn't like it either. Believe me; he based the show off of HIM and his TWIN SISTER. For Pete's Sake, No pinecest. EVER.

Soos: I love that song as much as I love Lazy Suzan. So here goes nothing.

I let it fall, my heart. And as it fell, you rose to claim it. It was dark and I was over. _Until you kissed my lips and you saved me_  
My hands, they're strong. _But my knees were far too weak. _To stand in your arms. Without falling to your feet  
_But there's a side to you that I never knew, never knew_ All the things you'd say, they were never true, never true And the games you play, you would always win, always win  
But I set fire to the rain_ Watched it pour as I touched your face_ Let it burn while I cry 'Cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name  
_When laying with you_ could stay there, close my eyes Feel you here, forever You and me together, nothing is better  
'Cause there's a side to you that I never knew, never knew All the things you'd say, they were never true, never true And the games you'd play, you would always win, always win  
But I set fire to the rain Watched it pour as I touched your face Let it burn while I cried 'Cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name  
_I set fire to the rain_ And I threw us into the flames Where I felt somethin' die, 'cause I knew that That was the last time, the last time  
_Sometimes I wake up by the door_ Now that you've gone, must be waiting for you Even now when it's already over I can't help myself from looking for you  
I set fire to the rain Watched it pour as I touched your face Let it burn while I cried 'Cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name  
I set fire to the rain And I threw us into the flames Where I felt somethin' die 'Cause I knew that that was the last time, the last time, oh  
Oh, no Let it burn, oh Let it burn Let it burn

Everyone: Happy New Year to you too!


End file.
